Being a parent is a part of life – and it’s a great part. Some think that having children means that life stops so that this new life can begin. It’s true. Having children means your life will never be the same again. You now have responsibilities that you didn’t have before and this will filter down into every area of your life. One area that having children shouldn’t affect, though, is your search for love.

Dating with children is perfectly normal and even recommended. The search for love is as natural as giving birth. If you want a relationship than you shouldn’t feel the need to stifle your quest. Dr. Ellen Kreidman uses what she calls the “oxygen mask” example to illustrate the point. When flying in a commercial airplane and cabin pressure drops, oxygen masks fall from overhead compartments. You are always instructed to put your mask on first before helping your children because if you loose consciousness, you won’t be able to help them. This is a fantastic example. If you’re unhappy in any area of your life, it will affect those around you and that can be more disastrous over the long term.

“What’s important is not whether you’re searching for romance, but how you’re searching for it.”

How you conduct yourself in your search for romance is important. Obviously, a dating lifestyle will also affect those around you, but it doesn’t mean that the effect will be negative. Children may not understand your dating so at times it’s better to be protective. We all know that relationships come and go but a child has yet to experience it. Experts recommend that you keep your dating private until something serious develops. Use your better judgment to ensure that everyone is protected.

When it comes to your online dating profile, you should be open about having children. This ensures that whomever you meet will know what they’re getting into. Tricking someone who’s not ready for the situation won’t change his or her attitude. If they think that they could be open to a relationship like that, it won’t stop them from dating you. Mention the ages of your children, too, as that plays into how your relationship will progress. Transparency is key to building a strong relationship built on trust.

Just because you’re a single parent doesn’t mean that only other single parents will be interested in dating you. I have a number of friends who have found love online with people who have children. It will obviously be an issue, but the crux of it is whether or not someone shares a similar mindset. Where people are in the course of their life helps determine this, but so does their experiences, and you won’t know what’s out there unless you try.

The question of whether or not to date when you have children is something that all single parents face. What’s important is not whether you’re searching for romance, but how you’re searching for it. Be smart, be tactful and you’re bound to be happier – and so will your children!