Articles : [ Relationship Advice ]


Rebound Relationships: Are they really for you?



By: Jenn Malko

Rebound RelationshipsIt’s normal to feel empty and alone after a long relationship comes to an end. It doesn’t matter if you were living with them and saw them every night and day or if your major form of communication was through instant messaging or the phone. When the routine of your life changes, there is going to be grief. Now most of us attempt to avoid pain and seek pleasure. In some cases, that means filling that hole in your life with someone else—and doing it quickly. That brings us to the rebound relationship and the dangers involved in it.

Finding a good match for us isn’t supposed to be easy. Human beings are just too complex to fit perfectly together with many people. If you’ve just come out of a serious relationship and think you’ve found another “keeper,” it might be a good time to step back and look at the possibility that this might be a rebound.

"The lines of communication need to be open with whomever you’re dating."

If you’re not serious about the person you’re dating, do they know it? Just because you broke up with your mate of three years yesterday and this new person is aware of that, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’ve clued in to what you have in mind. The lines of communication need to be open with whomever you’re dating. In the end, it will mean less stress and pain for all involved.

If you’re looking to be the rebound for someone coming out of a long relationship, you could be playing with fire. It really depends on your needs and desires. Ask yourself if you’re willing to spend your time with this person to only have them up and leave when they’re strong enough to cope with living life on their own. If the answer is yes, then go ahead and good luck. If not, then it’s best to back off and leave the rebound relationships to those better suited for the bumps.

Rebound relationship resources:

Divorces And Rebounds: An About.com expert chats on rebounds after a marriage breaks up

Rebounds: A look from the perspective of Astrologer Lorna MacKinnon

Rebound Relationships for Teens: A youthful look at coping after a breakup

People And Rebounds: Looking for love right after romance is wrecked

Feel free to leave any comments or other rebound relationship ideas below!

Tell others what you thought about this article. Please keep it civil.

Name:  
Comments:

(Max characters)
Enter the code:
 


Comments by: emma..
My boyfriend recently broke up with the exam pressure and the whole lot... he s moved straight on.. i know he has feeling it was a long and serious relationship... how do i make him realize he s being an idiot, and making a fool of this girl. its so difficult. he s pretending he had no feelings, that hurts the most i know he did, why is he trying to be so macho. we cried together as we brke up???

Comments by: doris
I have to say, I was the one being used , and it has been 8 years, and I am still in pain! I just believe in karma,and one day he will get his, I want to still be alive to see it.

Comments by: Kevin
My ex and I just broke up a month ago,We have a 2 year old daughter together and we still live together.w ehave been together for 3 years. She has a new boyfriend and is 9 weeks pregnant for him. she spends just about every night at his house. Im hurt but Im dealing with it as best I can. She even took my daughter aound this guy just days after we broke up on Christmas Eve.

Comments by: Paul
I am in rebound with someone called Lou .. is that you?

Comments by: Beth Allen
My husband of 20 years left me 3 months ago. He is in a new relationship after 1 month. He is a policeman and had a severe head injury last year June 17th, before he left he told me there was noone else and I loved me and our daughter. Now where he moved to is the womans he is having a relationship with. She works in the same office. Now he treats our daughter and me like scum.

Comments by: Elle
Seven months ago, I got out of a emotionally abusive relationship and a months and a half later I met my Boyfriend of now. I was half way getting over my ex and dealing that we would never get back together when this guy came in to my life. Six months on, I m deeply in love and he stuck around for me and helped me to get through the painful part of my life. xxx

Comments by: Louise
I am in a rebound relationship, but we are both hyper aware of the implecations and openly, honestly communicate about it. I also believe there is potential for our relationship. It s definitely risky, though. But any relationship is risky. Bottom line: He s worth the risk. I ll take my chances.

Comments by: bob
I got involved with an old friend after a long relationship. Rebound is certaintly there, but we keep the communication open and follow our guts as much as possible. I think any relationship after a long one is at risk of being short term, but lots of potential is there if both people are willing to keep the communication lines clear. It all depends on the two people involved.