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November 14, 2006
Alone for the Holidays
In Canada, Thanksgiving, precedes Halloween, so that means we go straight from glow-in-dark plastic skeletons to wreaths, trees and lights in the stores. Our neighbors down south have one holiday hurdle before December 25 and that of course is the hugely popular American Thanksgiving.
Nevertheless, whichever side of the border you’re from, if you're single you might feel a bit depressed to be spending these occasions on your own. Those lucky enough to spend it at home with the rest of their family might take comfort in not being without loved ones during the season.
Then again, faced with married siblings or in some cases, your original set of parents still together for myriad decades; it can increase a sense of loneliness. It also doesn't help if you have numerous well-meaning relatives saying that they can’t understand why someone so intelligent, good-looking and charming can't find someone with whom to settle down.
They say you're special but you know they clearly wonder what is secretly so wrong with you. Luckily, they normally try to soften the blow by implying that there just isn’t anyone good enough for you. In other words, you're stuck up and delusional holding out for someone who will probably never come along or you obviously have "commitment issues" that imply you haven't been choosey enough with the string o losers you've dated.
Time now for the silver lining and there is one. Independence does have its perks. When I'm solo for the festivities, I fully enjoy the feasting without worrying that anyone will see the giant welt my waistband is leaving after that third piece of pie. Moreover, on the food front, no one expects me to cook. Pity invitations to other people's houses are fine, since my share of dinner preparation normally only involves opening the bottle of wine I brought.
When it comes to presents, I can buy one for myself. I always know exactly what I'd like. I never have to worry whether it's too extravagant or that I might take it the wrong way. I already know that I'm fully committed to myself, so I won't panic, even if I give myself jewelry or a trip. I'll also get to keep my present forever. No danger of a nasty breakup or haunting memories every time I wear the cashmere sweater I gave myself.
Finally, during a time of year when you're supposed to be nice to everyone, sometimes it's simply fulfilling to have one less person to worry about when you get back home and you don't want to deck the halls anymore. You can simply undo your pants, sit back and think of all the work of holiday romance that you get to skip.
Posted by Will at November 14, 2006 4:40 PM
