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October 2, 2007
Finding A Fit Kiss
I'm not cut out for fitness dating. Even watching someone else cycle or pant on a treadmill is enough to exhaust me. But you know, these extra pounds aren't going to work themselves away (well, until my new "Osmosis Diet" hits the bookstores). It takes a considerable amount of wherewithal to hit the gym, but the results are visible even after a few days. A fit kiss may not feel any different than a fat kiss, but the bodies that are attached to those two types of lips makes all the difference when it comes to dating. Of course, when your primary means of interaction is over a keyboard, you could look like Jabba the Hutt or Colin Farrell for all the rest world knows. A little less poundage does affect someone's outlook, however.
When you're celebrating another Happy New Year, it's almost like you're contractually obligated to work out more, eat less, be kind to dogs, call your mother/father more often, yadda yada yadda. I don't care if you already look like a model for a Gold's Gym - those resolutions are going to be the same. I do the same pledges year after year, and while I'm generally good with my parents/dogs/eating habits, that first iron-clad promise to hit the gym more often never actually materializes. The whole thing just smacks of effort, and for a lazy procrastinator such as myself, that's a no-go area.
Naturally that lack of gumption has its consequences: difficulty running for anything other than an elevator, a glazed look that comes over my face whenever anybody says that they're going to "blast their quads", and a fondness for movies and dating rather than dates that involve rock-climbing. Looking at some of the hot specimens on fitness dating sites (people who break the stereotype of porky online daters), I can't help but feel like I'm missing something. Maybe it's about time the local Y got treated to the sight of me having a heart attack while running in a circle. We can only dream!
Posted by Glen at October 2, 2007 2:34 AM
