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May 11, 2007
Leaving behind bad relationships
There's nothing like getting out of a bad relationship; it's like escaping from Shawshank. Everybody's had 'em, and whenever a new paramour enters one's life, there's the inevitable "bad relationship" chat where you both recount horror stories. These emotional train wrecks are pretty amusing to relate with the distance of time and hindsight, but they're certainly not very much fun to go through. From the first initial fights, growing tension, and the final confrontation when one or both partners announces "I don't love you", bad relationships are a delight to leave behind. Getting over these trials is the first step to getting back into the swing of things and finding a better partner, and the freedom to talk about these unpleasant episodes with friends and new lovers is positively emancipating.
There's gradients to badness of course. It takes an exceptionally strong, brave person to "laugh off" a physically or sexually abusive past relationship; such relationships are several steps removed from the sort of irritating bad behavior that I'm speaking of here. The "bad relationships" that I'm talking about here is where two people (who may be completely functional, fun human beings when they're apart) are absolutely poison when they share the same space. They also might have the same attitude towards relationships that Cinderella's evil stepsisters had towards enchanted slippers - they'll MAKE IT FIT, no matter what the cost.
There's also the scenario in which two people start out fine and dandy, fondly in love, but certain massive character differences pop up that makes them want to throw toasters at each other. Everyone's been in one of these situations, even if it lasted for a grand total of three dates. It can be hard letting the girl go or watching the guy leave the house for the last time, but when things hit a breaking point it's often best to cut your losses.
Once it's over for good, time heals all wounds and a little bit of breathing room gives people a rush of relief. I'm being obvious beyond belief, but a bad relationship is easier to get over than a good one gone sour; yes, there's a lonely feeling, and reading a break-up letter will be far greater torture than writing a love letter, but with the help of hindsight and a few good friends a bad relationship can be washed out of your mind as rapidly as it entered your life.
Posted by Glen at May 11, 2007 2:14 AM
