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October 4, 2005
Who Pays?
I was asked the question of who pays for a date last week in an interview. It’s a great question, I think. Historically, it has been the man. They made the money so they should pay. These days, there’s basic wage parity so why does the responsibility still stay with the man? Seriously, WHY?? Sure, haircuts are more expensive for women, but we really don’t care if your shoes match your purse or not – at least not enough to pay for every date we go on! Yes, truth be told, this is how I feel.
I think it should be common knowledge that dates should either be split or there should be shared responsibility in some way. The best was that they decided to use my quote on wage parity to promo the piece, so I had my good friends calling me up to call me cheap.
I don’t think I’m cheap. I think I just have it dialed. Now do me a favor and don't mention this to my dates. ;)
Posted by CupidsReviews Doug at October 4, 2005 4:48 PM
Comments
Interesting look on the who-pays issue... in part I can agree: both men and women now make money. However there are still strong gender roles in society, and women sometimes do not work fulltime, or men sometimes feel strongly in favor of paying. It strokes their ego and makes them feel "useful". I think it depends on the two people involved... not just on social pressure.
Posted by: chris at October 5, 2005 12:01 PM
Actually; then you can also ask the following question: who assumes what? If you go on a date, do you tell the woman beforehand if the bill will be split? Big clunky wallets do not always fit in our purses... so how do you clarify this? some people could take offense if you pick them up with some flowers and say "hey honey, I like you.. but you're paying for your own drinks tonight". So how do we solve this?
Posted by: Dating S..O..S (datingsos.com) at October 5, 2005 12:03 PM
Well thats it exactly, isn't it Chris! How do we solve it? By chatting on blogs like this. It's not going to happen over night . . . but slowly . . . down the road . . . maybe not for our children, but our childrens'children might find themseves in a different society than the one we face today. Equality is a good thing and it should cover everyone and everything.
Posted by: Cupids Reviews Doug at October 6, 2005 9:22 AM
How much we, the people, how much we are near to nature? I think we are not! As I know in The World there are very much dating agency … in Internet they are unlimited number. And after some free of charge steps the clients (or visitors), they need to pay some money from step to step or for limited member time period.
I do not like this situation! What about you?
I do not like this and it is the main reason I’ll try to start absolutely free Dating web site, free of any charges in all steps of your personal meetings and confidential, too on the base of Google’s Talk.
Please, check it and let me know what do you think.
Regards,
Don
Posted by: Doncho Pachikov at October 8, 2005 8:42 AM
This stuff is fairly simple: If you want this to end with sex and without having the girl cheat on you, you split or make her pay all. If you want end in the Let's-Just-Be-Friends zone (though with no chance of conflict), you pay.
This has been tested a bunch by the seduction community.
-Eek
Posted by: Eek at October 27, 2005 11:11 AM
I think you have a good point about "paying" being equal but what happened to chivalry? Honestly, women don't mind paying but I think it's a matter of being a gentleman. My mother used to tell me "It's ok to offer to pay but if you end up paying, lose the jerk."
Posted by: Tammy at December 11, 2005 2:12 AM
I disagree COMPLETLY with your use of the word gentleman in relation to paying. Being a lady or gentleman is a mindset, not a duty.
Posted by: Tyric at December 12, 2005 11:53 AM
